It used to be an ear that I needed, someone to hear my feelings.
But none was to be found –
So in my thoughts and mind, suicidal thoughts I drowned.
It used to be a lover that I wished for, time after time, but I have found that, and lost that, one or more times.
The rest only said it, because quite frankly, I don’t know why.
Please, do not ever say you love someone, knowing that it is a lie.
I used to be strong alone, happily and optimistically pursuing my heart’s desire for a brighter future.
But it got extremely lonesome.
I prayed to Jesus, and knew that he could provide me reason.
But still –
How can I believe in something that I cannot even feel!
I begged and hoped, thought and prayed for a love, and partner.
That’s all I really want.
I don’t need or want anything else.
I just want to be felt.
I want to be attracted to that person of course.
I feel like my emotions are becoming hoarse.
I hear a voice that says to hold on.
But what for?
No one sees what I mean,
what I envision and hope for.
I don’t even know how to express anymore.
I was there, I was stronger.
But Now I don’t even know how to express anymore.
I don’t know what to do.
I don’t want to do this anymore.
I don’t want to do this anymore.
I don’t want to do this anymore.
I don’t want to do this anymore.