Detach

I am wrought of emotions, and empathy is forced to feel again.

I look for signs, and secretly wish to be hugged.

I needed kisses and warmth growing up, beatings and depression weren’t enough.

It was a torture to my delicate mind inside my skull.

And my soul became calloused and cold.

But after time it became warm again by teachers,

Still I wanted to die and meet the reaper.

I felt like nothing made sense, especially when home felt like a hell.

Am I under some sort of spell, and what is this smell, of meanness and hate.

Each time I open the door?

You raise me to be naive?

You have driven me insane.

You have cracked my brain.

Left me in closets.

Beaten me with metal bats, all because I am not your biological child?

Why did you degrade me, stepfather?

Why did you abuse me.

Why did you use me.

Mother why would you allow him.

You are a female coward.

I do not hate you.

I do not even love you.

I love the world, but not you two.

If there are people that I will not love ever, it will be you two. Until you are on your knees begging for me to forgive you.

Otherwise, I am so wise to not let you off of the hook.

I deserve an apology because you two are crooks.

You stole my childhood and tried to turn me black.

I am saddened but I am growing stronger again.

I disown you as family.

You have thrusted upon me, insanity.

And now I am trying to piece together scraps and shards.

I am lucky to know I am not hard, because by God’s Grace he has given me insight and a special kind of love.

And he shows me that what you two did, was not right.

And what you two have done, has been evil and immoral.

And I will never ever be loyal – to a mean spirited soul like Yusef.

You are a disgrace to fatherhood and mankind.

I dislike you, and will never respect you, until I am given an apology.

You owe that to me!

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